EMDR Therapy

Do you or anyone you know find yourself overwhelmed by fear?  If so, I wrote an article on EMDR therapy that you may find really helpful.

It’s posted today over on the Preemie Babies 101 Website. Please know that EMDR is not just for parents of premature babies.  EMDR is wonderful resource for anyone working toward overcoming trauma.

Here’s a bit of the article.  If you want to read more, please click the link below to read the rest.

“I entered our local grocery store, only to have my eye catch the front page of a Boston newspaper.  A photo of a large hypodermic needle and the big, bold letters across the front page read “Swine Flu…” but before I could read the rest, my knees buckled and I had to hold on to a nearby display rack to keep from falling over.

“I can’t live this way anymore,” I hissed at myself.  Then I stood up straighter, pulled my shoulders back and said it again.  ”I can’t live this way anymore.”

I turned around and left the store, dialing the phone number of my friend.  When I asked if she could help me find a good therapist (she works as a grief counselor) she suggested I look into EMDR therapy.

And I did…”

A Need For Change: EMDR Therapy

If you want more information or have further questions about my experience with EMDR, I’m happy to answer as best I can. Either leave a comment over on the preemiebabies101 blog post, here on this post, or you can email me at premature journey@gmail.com.

With blessings,

Kasey

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New Knee

Do you know anyone who has an upcoming surgery?  Perhaps my husband’s story will help…

Three days ago I was sitting in the hospital waiting room while my husband, Lee was having the ACL and meniscus in his knee repaired.

As you may know from my book or blog, I believe illness and injury, though an unwelcome guest, can be opportunities for personal growth.  It’s been amazing to follow Lee on his journey, as he’s gone from seeming incredibly vulnerable, to information gathering and eventually empowered and certain.  As much as I wanted to insert myself in his process, I had to repeatedly remind myself that this is his journey and for him to learn all his lessons, I could support him, but not do the work for him.  (If you have a child undergoing surgery, as a parent, you can do the following recommended exercises on your child’s behalf, as we did for our daughter.)

That being said, when we first learned he needed surgery, I left Peggy Huddleston’s book, Prepare for Surgery, Heal Faster on his bedside table.  It was a few nights later when I found him already in bed half-way through Chapter One.  “You’re so subtle,” was all he said. I hid my smile behind my hand.

And my smile continued to grow as I watched and witnessed Lee accept and embrace the suggestions in Huddleston’s book as his surgery date approached.

He reached out to the people he works with, the guys he mountain bikes with, and all his ski racing buddies to create the suggested “support group.”  “Hey if you think of it,” he would say, “send some positive energy my way Monday morning at 7:30.”  Later, on our drive to the hospital he confessed that wasn’t easy for him.  “To put myself out there like that, to ask them to think of me, was really hard,” but after a moment he added, “But I’m so glad I did because it was very well received and they felt included in my process.”

The other big take-away from Prepare for Surgery, Heal Faster was the healing statements.  These are intentions written out by the patient and read by someone in the operating room as the patient goes under and comes out of anesthesia.  Huddleston talks in her book about the research that has proven that even when a patient is anesthetized, he/she is still hearing what is said during surgery.  She sites examples from hospitals in Boston, New York, Atlanta and London who’ve all shown that “patients who had positive statements spoken to them during general anesthesia recovered more quickly with less pain and complications than the patients in the control group, who were not given the statements.”

In the pre-op room, Lee mustered up his courage to hand the sheet of loose leaf paper on which he’d written his statements to the anesthesiologist and ask that they be read during surgery.  I watched Lee relax into the bed when the anesthesiologist said, “Yeah, I’ve seen this several times now. Must be somethin’ going around.”

Prior to surgery, we learned that Lee had the choice to use one of his own tendons to replace his, or one from a donor.  Based on his age (46) it was repeatedly recommended he use the donor option.  It was about a week before surgery that it really hit home for Lee that his new tendon would be coming from someone whose life had been cut short.  The last of his healing statements reflects that.  With his permission, these are the statements he wrote:

* I look forward to this procedure and wish for it to go smoothly, efficiently and as simply as possible in a safe and clean environment.

* My immediate post-op recovery will be pain-free, and set the stage for a pain-free rehabilitation.

* All medications from surgery will transfer easily out of my body.

* My body’s response will be swift, thorough and strong.

* I express deep gratitude to the donor of this tissue and intend that this tissue will be welcomed and accepted as a part of my body.

I can happily report that three days post-surgery, Lee is doing wonderfully well.  He’s off all pain meds, making good progress on his physical therapy and already making plans for next ski season!

Pre-surgery with amazing surgeon, Dr. Chen of The Alpine Clinic

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Just out of surgery with repaired knee.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ready to head home

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Picking up kids at school – 4 hours post surgery

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reiki Master, Libby Barnett treating Lee.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

On the porch soaking up some nice Vitamin D.

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Word of the Year

Since mid-December, when It came to my attention that some people are in the habit of choosing a “Word of the Year,” I’ve been pondering mine.

I had a whole list of contenders – organize, inspire, simplify, balance, joy, serenity, pleasure, transformation, clarity, all close, but none sent that tingle down my spine confirming I’d found “The One.”

All the while I thought of potential words, another reel looped in my head criticizing me for all that I’m not, all that I haven’t done, and all that I haven’t been.  And the closer December 25th drew near, the louder the voice became.

“You don’t clean enough.  You don’t cook enough. You don’t write enough.  You don’t read enough.   You don’t blog enough.  You don’t tweet enough.  You don’t have enough blog or twitter followers.  You don’t focus enough.  You don’t try enough.  You’re not good enough.”

It was the last one, heard one too many times, that finally got me.  “Enough,” I yelled out.  Enough.

As soon as the word left my mouth, I felt the tingle down my spine.  It was my Word of the Year.  Enough.  But Enough is a complicated, multifaceted word, and I wasn’t entirely sure how it was meant to apply to my life beyond telling that negative voice to shut the f… up.

It was on the Reiki table in early January that I finally understood.

Before every session, my Reiki Master, Libby and I sit opposite each other and talk about what I’m hoping to get out of the session – set our intentions if you may.  Sometimes I’m really clear as to what I’d like to focus on, while other times I just wait to see what emerges. That day I was really clear.

(If you’d like to know more about Reiki, check out Libby’s website. There’s also a chapter in my book that illustrates my first-hand experience.)

“I am so tired of feeling less than,” I told Lib. “Of comparing myself to others and feeling like I’m not enough.”  Hearing my own words reminded me to explain that I’d chosen Enough as my Word of the Year, but that I didn’t really understand why.

“Why don’t you feel like you’re enough?” Lib asked.

I explained how I put myself out there as this writer and blogger, but that in reality, most of the time I don’t even know what the heck I was doing.  I told Libby about these unwritten rules that seem to exist for authors and bloggers, and how I’m never quite sure if I’m doing it right, and most of the time I’m pretty sure I’m not.

We kept talking.

“The thing is that’s so weird,” I told her, “ is that the voice that says I’m not good enough, is really not mine. It’s not the real me. Not the me in my soul.”  I held my hand to the back of my head.  “It’s the voice that lives in the back of my skull, on the right side down by the base of my spine.  The real me knows that I do enough and have enough. The real me knows that I am enough.”

“So where do you suppose that voice comes from?” Lib asked.

“From outside, I guess.”  I looked out the window and thought a moment.  “It comes when I look at what and how other people are doing things and think that their way is the way I should be doing my things, even if it doesn’t really feel true to me.”

Compare and Despair ran through my head.

And then, in the blink of an eye, I got it.

“When I do things my way,” I said, “I am enough.”

Libby clapped her hands together.  “Say it again,” she said.

“When I do things my way, I am enough.”

“When you do things your way, you are Enough,” she repeated.

I remembered an appointment I had years ago with our energy healer, Karen.  “You’re always looking to everybody else for all the right answers, when really, they’re right inside of you,” she had said.  And finally, I understood what she meant.  If I’m true to myself, if I honor what feels right for me, then I am Enough.

I AM ENOUGH.

AND SO ARE YOU.

And so are you.

 

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